Can you make a living out of art? How?

As promised, here is the second film of people in Galway, giving their views on if its possible to make a living from art, along with some tips on how to do it.

As contradictions spread in all directions, it might be best to ask the experts tomorrow in the Gallery Cafe in the Galway City Museum, at 4.30!

Why is art important for humans?

We wanted to do something special in build up to our event on Saturday, and get the people of Galway involved, so we decided to make a short film... After the Darklight Film event recently, we were convinced anyone could do it!

So it was conceived, filmed and edited by the very own meetforeal crew.

Monday: Camera arrives in post

Tuesday: Hit the streets in cloud-like Galway weather and film 9 people, asking them what they think about art, and how they promote it

Wednesday: Edit clips and put it all together

Today: Release of part 1:
What comes into your head when you think "Art"
and
Why is art important for humans?

So with my editing skills developing by the minute, here's proof that anyone can make a film! I am proud to present: Why is art important for humans:

Next we release more footage on:Can you make a living from art?

and How?

So come back and visit us to check it out! :)

Developing Equanimity

When I worked as a waitress in Wildwood, I was asked once why I was so friendly to the customers - why I bothered being so smiley, offering them a helping hand, never a harsh word or an angry comment; even when customers left no tip, or were rude to me; even when I was tired or in a bad mood.... (That might be exaggerating a tad, the illusions of memories)

I said it was because it wasn't fair on the customer for me to inflict my bad day on him/her. If I infected someone, then they would infect someone else, and it would infect the whole world... eventually. I didn't understand what the point was of adding more nastiness to the already unhappy world, and that if I could brighten up one persons day with the effort of a smile, then it was a generous offering, one that might be spread around the world instead.

That was a long time ago now... and I have since learned that there are deeper forces at work - behaviours related to extraverts, and non-zero-sum games etc, and as such my illusion has been partially shattered, however it's a convenient interpretation which sounds pretty and positive and nice, and it still represents what I believe. And it's related to my current problem: Writing.

It has never been my intention to cause anyone pain, see earlier idyllic story. As a writer, I enjoy expressing my ideas, hopefully positive ones, and sharing my experiences; however I was just reminded recently that it can be quite tough to be a writer, and not for all the reasons that have been explained to me previously.

They tell you that to be a writer, you need to be persistent, able to take the constant rejections, the battery of kicks in the face, and face the ever-growing competition with unrelenting self belief. But I don't remember anyone advising me to be tame in my subject choice so I wouldn't offend or annoy people. You don't get famous by being popular right? But who's gonna buy your books if no one likes you?

I was reminded that the world is full of people with different ideas, people who interpret the world from a unique point of view, and not everyone can be open and forgiving of opinions that conflict with their own viewpoint.

I was reminded that as a naive, honest and forthcoming writer, it's particularly easy to harass, hurt, inflict psychological pain, annoy, offend, attack and abuse people without intending to through the written word.

What's surprising to me is how hurtful it is to be the writer on the receiving end of someone else's negative interpretation. It can feel like a personal attack, on the choice of content, on the writing style, on the writer themselves.

This is what they must mean by developing a thick skin - but I always thought it referred to being rejected - I can handle being rejected. I don't like to think that I am offending people. That makes me feel sick to my stomach.

It can create this spiral of negativity:

• Piece published, no offence intended


• Writing interpreted as offensive


• Reader feels awful


• Reader relays back the offensive nature of the piece


• Offence interpreted by the writer as personally offensive


• Writer feels awful


• Writer goes on rampage to offend more people... well maybe not

So what do I do now? Do I keep writing about banal topics so I can keep my readers happy? Do I have to be careful about what I say? What about being honest and saying what I think and believe? But I don't want to be stressing myself out that I have offended someone or that I will offend someone...!

So I thought some of you out there might have gone through, or be going through the same dilemma, and I wanted to share with you this piece I read from "Insight Meditation", quite fittingly on the day I myself received mild negative feedback, and it helped tremendously: here's just an excerpt.

"It's said that a man once visited the Buddha's monastery to ask questions about his teachings. The first person he saw was a monk sitting in meditation. This monk had taken a temporary vow of silence, so when the visitor questioned him, he didn't respond at all. The man stomped away, furious.

He returned the next day and encountered a monk who, as well as being highly realized, was particularly erudite and scholarly. In response to his question, the monk launched into a very elaborate theoretical discourse about the Buddha's teaching. Again, the man became furious, and left.

On his third visit, the man came upon another senior disciple of the Buddha named Ananda. Ananda had heard what had happened on the man's previous visit, so he was careful to respond, but not to say too much. The man again, flew into a rage. "How dare you teach such profound and weighty matters so sketchily?" he demanded and strode off angrily.

The monks went to the Buddha and asked him to cast some light on what had happened. The Buddha said, "If you say nothing, some people will blame you; if you say a lot, some people will blame you; if you say just a little, some people will blame you. There's always blame in this world."

That's the nature of our lives. You can probably remember, at some point in your life, having received both strong praise and strong blame for the identical action. It's inevitable.

In the constant changing climate of praise and blame, our refuge lies in an understanding of our own motivation. It means that we must be incredibly honest and sensitive to our own motivation, and to the level of skill with which we act - because that, more than anything, will reveal to us the nature of the action. What other people say may hurt or please us, but it's not an accurate reflection of our integrity."

So in future I will do my utmost to pull up my writers socks, and make a more concerted effort to establish why I'm writing what I'm writing, and if it could harm anyone, and if I feel that my motivation, and intention is good, then I'll continue.

Apologies for the length! Thanks for reading!

Fighting jealousy with hatred to reach success

So I read a blog post right now, and it's happening again. It's a long post, well written, lots of comments, the content is good. And here's the problem:

I feel jealous.

Similarly it happens when I find a cool website of a company that's succeeding at doing something similar to what we are trying to do.

The internet causes such conflicting emotions, or perhaps it simply enhances those I am already experiencing. This morning I was in awe, enjoying and laughing at some videos I found on Chris Reeds blog, and this evening I am consumed with jealousy. It can be so exhausting, but I keep coming back because of the value - but is the pain worth the reward?

I find my brain quietly working out ways to undermine the blog, trying to find holes in his argument, flaws in his grammar. I am almost about to comment something mean like, "do you not think people need to come to these conclusions about these things by themselves... " but I run out of steam. I have no basis to my argument. I just need to rebuild my ego.

Recovering from sense of failure:

I read in "Stumbling on Happiness" by Daniel Gilbert, about an experiment that was conducted to measure how long it takes to recover from criticism depending on the circumstances. He talks about the ways we adapt to something once it has happened through a variety of rationalisations that we don't foresee - through these so-called errors of imagination.

They found that the time it takes to recover is much shorter if you are judged incompetent by only one person, e.g. you fail to get offered a job after a job interview with one person; than being on the receiving end of 5 people's opinions of you being incompetent.

You do this by rationalising why those people were wrong. Maybe you internally call them idiots, decide that they wouldn't know a good employee if they saw one, or maybe they were simply having a bad day etc. And obviously it's easier to do with only one person, and so you recover quicker.

Anyway, where was I headed with this?

Jealous reaction = feel like a failure

Oh yes - so when I read other people's work, and it's pretty good, I immediately have this jealous reaction. I recognise that they are a competitor, or that they are doing better than me, and somehow I judge myself as having failed. In that jealous instant, they have succeeded, or are a step ahead of me.



Jealousy makes my brain prepare the whole give up speech, "There's no point me writing anymore because there are already so many good writers out there, I'll just go and get a job instead... blah blah blah."

I am constantly aware of this instinct, damn meditation messing with my awareness, so it's like I'm constantly being followed around by an invisible evil monster as I browse the web, who whispers, "You should have thought of this, you could have written that, why didn't you?". I need someone to send me a drawing of said menacing creature.

So my brain has to find a rational way out of this, it has to adapt otherwise I may give up - if us humans let jealousy win, none of us would ever do anything with our lives... so there has to be a safety mechanism built in, right? And I think it mine may be hatred...

Recovery Mechanism = Hatred


I'm sorry bloggers, but I have to save myself, and in order to build up my ego. I have to break you great bloggers down, otherwise I end up being jealous of you, and quitting.

So sometimes I find myself secretly hating people. I find myself poking holes in their research, attacking their personality, I convince myself they are losers, or they are full of shite... and then I generate this strong dislike for people I have never even had a conversation with. Sometimes the secret hatred progresses so far without me realising it, that I find myself not retweeting their tweets.

But then I feel guilty when I realise that I hate people that I've never met... that's a bit extreme...

But why does hatred protect me better than jealousy?

When I say jealousy, I really mean:

Envy: "a feeling of grudging admiration and desire to have something that is possessed by another."

And why does hatred protect me better than envy?

Hatred: "Rebellion against good accompanied by aggression. Hatred results in annihilation."

Annihilation - now that's cool!

So I don't know what's more upsetting - the jealousy, the exhaustion from secretly carrying around all this hatred for people who only exist as words on a screen, or the guilt when I realise I hate them in the first place for no real reason, other than the protection of my own ego.

Guilt: "the state of having committed an offense."

The positive about all of this is that I am also aware of the bloggers that I really like and admire - the words on a screen that I look forward to reading, and am blind to their flaws. You guys are wonderful, inspirational, and beyond the petty rationalisations of jealousy, hatred or guilt, but unfortunately, you are generally writing out of my genre, or way above my level of expertise, she says as though she has a field of expertise :)

Conclusion = I am insane

So I reckoned I was just going insane to be honest, I still do think I am going insane. No one else can possibly be feeling what I am feeling, except... I'm human, so I can't be the only one feeling this resentment, right? How are you guys dealing with it??

Watching this video from Alain de Botton on TED, "A kinder, gentler philosophy of success," I think he put his finger on it for me, and I felt I must get some balls and write about it. It goes back to his idea that in our generation, we have this idea that anything is possible - that we can do anything we set our minds to. So it's a tough environment to be attempting to succeed in.

If we all have the potential to be the best, and be successful - however a person defines success - how do we deal with the fact that most of us are not "successful" yet? Are we failures until we are successful? What's in between?

He can explain it more eloquently than me anyhow:

How we all employ eachother

Leading on from the previous article about how great employers are, I was also reminded recently how we are all the employers of others. We are all creating stable jobs for eachother.

Someone twittered recently about the guilt they felt in purchasing the Sunday Newspaper as it had probably meant the sacrifice of some poor unsuspecting tree in a distant region of the world. I twittered back that he shouldn't feel guilty because by purchasing that reworked tree, he had contributed to the employment of journalists, graphic designers, PR companies, paper manufacturers, tree cutters, reforestation experts, newsagents... the list goes on. And he wondered in turn if all those people knew he was partially employing them... probably not.

In meetforeal creating an event, I realised that we are contributing towards creating employment - both directly - e.g. paying a cameraman for a few hours work, and indirectly - e.g. renting a venue. If you think about how far the web travels, the side effects are quite impressive:

For just one event, as well as a cameraman, and a venue, we are creating news for a journalist to include in their section of the paper, we may be paying hotels (expert speakers and ourselves) to have more beds full, so they can pay their receptionist, and airlines to have one more bum in their seats (expert speaker), so they can pay their pilot; we are paying a graphic designer to design flyers, and they have paid for the software they are using (in a perfect world), which contributes to paying the programmers; we are paying a printer to make flyers, which contributes towards the cost of producing ink, and printing equipment.

Then if you are coming to the event, you may use public transport to come into town, so bus drivers are paid, and perhaps while you are in the area, you grab a sandwich in the nearby coffee shop, from the friendly waitress - that you wouldn't otherwise have done...

Ok, that's stretching the web a little far, but as you can see, the strands of the connections in all directions are endless.

I love to feel that I am contributing towards employing others, as well as employing myself, and that I am helping out in some way to reduce the negativity and spiralling events. Unfortunately for my ego, it is not only me personally, or meetforeal who are contributing, but it is all the people who participate in the event, who enable this web of employment to occur.

By us inventing the idea for an event, and by experts volunteering to come to share their experiences and ideas; by you all choosing to purchase tickets, telling your friends, coming along on the day, and participating; and by companies helping out by sponsoring the event, we are filtering the money through and all helping to keep the economy moving.

What's also great is that we have a voice, and we can all vote with our declining funds for the things we want to see survive - our favourite bistro, the cute little clothes shop on the corner, the comedian on a Wednesday night, or the meetforeal event :) and now when our money really counts, we are directly, or indirectly contributing towards supporting each other in activities that are positive.

Why I Think Employers Rock

As a budding entrepreneur, one of the things that has been evoked in me recently, is a huge respect for those who create stable employment for others.

Now that I know how hard it is to generate income, how much of your life is spent thinking, dreaming, planning and measuring for the future, how difficult it is to switch off, to feel secure that there will be money in your account at the end of the month, or to know when your next holiday will be, I can see things differently.

Saying that, employers don't generally employ people for altruistic reasons - its tit for tat, and each side is serving their own interest. Hopefully, employers are creating employment through the act of doing what they love, because of a vision that they want to see come to life, so it serves in their best interest to have hard working employees willing to participate in the creation of that vision, in exchange for certain benefits. As an employer, the potential to create global impact, to have a salary larger than that of any employee and eventually the option, if successful, to take long extended breaks, is hinged on employing good people.

Self serving as it is, why do I still think it's incredible?

When I see how much dedication is required to get a company off the ground, how much time and effort is poured into a seeming bottomless pit for so long before there are signs of progress, I now have a new found admiration for the generosity that previous employers had, not only to work tirelessly on their side to ensure that the company kept running smoothly, but also for the fact that they started it in the first place. That they went through the dip, of competition, and looking for funding, and support, and help, spent time and money, and that they succeeded at developing a successful enterprise that could grow and actually support the lives and activities of others.

Their persistence to see their idea through, to take the risks and believe in their vision meant that I too could benefit.

I hope one day that I can give people stable, secure jobs to help me develop my vision and mission, and in turn enable them to start work at 9, and leave at 5, and to bitch about me, occasionally.

Leading on from this, it occurred to me that we are all the employers of others, and, at the same time, all employees. More on that tomorrow.

How I hate sharing.... grrrr

I have had a shocking insight recently into the big bad world of owning your own business. It's insane to watch how people jump on the bandwagon whenever you start something - they all want a piece of it.
jumping on the bandwagon.

The amount of frustration that it evokes in me is insanely out of proportion - I feel like I've done all the work, creating something out of nothing, starting something that was just a brief idea in my head, giving it food and water, and time and effort, and watching it grow into an actual thing I can touch, something real, and credible, and happening... and then suddenly, all these people want to get in on it.

In one way it's entirely frustrating - I feel like telling the world to get the f*ck off my land - while they were sitting in the sunshine reading a book, I was out tending the crops, and now my crops are ready, all these stragglers are arriving to help me harvest! It's like - piss off - I did all the hard work!!

At the same time, I have to calm myself, because sharing is so important, collaboration, working together to make something better... and realistically, if people pitch in, we will be able to gather enough food to satisfy everyone, and if I don't get their help, then I can't harvest all the crops alone, and I won't get the full potential out of it.

So I guess this is how the world works... but grrrr nonetheless... I'm selfish! It's a hard lesson for us young entrepreneurs!

Ellens simplistic version of cancer=ireland in a recessopm

I had a wonderful conversation with a taxi driver in Dublin recently, as you do, on the state of our country. I was asking him how the mindset is in Dublin, not living there myself, and how the doom and gloom is affecting people.

During the course of our conversation, it hit me how much a recession is like that awful period in between getting diagnosed with a life threatening illness, and making a decision on a treatment plan, from my own experience.

Previously, I couldn't see why we were so stuck in a rut. Why we couldn't just seem to pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and get moving, get positive, get to changing things for the better. Now I think I know why...

I know there are companies, and organisations, and people in Ireland who are all attempting to protect themselves from the infectious state of our negative media and their ever darkening pessimism; to keep on trying, keep on pushing, keep on working towards an eventual solution. But as for the majority...

After my enlightening conversation, I think the solution is clear:

Cancer: You think you are fine, healthy, but you find a lump.
Doctor tells you it's nothing.
You want to believe everything's ok. You are not sick.

Country: Rumours circle that something is wrong, people ignore it.
Keep on buying houses, keep on building houses...
Everyone wants to believe everything's ok. The crisis is not a crisis.

Cancer: Lump gets bigger.
You get it checked out again, it doesn't look good -
Panic sets in - how big is the problem?
Must get some tests...

Country: More people start saying that the world is going to end...
Banks buckle under the pressure.
Can't hide it anymore - how big is this problem?
The country gets some tests...

Cancer: You are told, it's in your breast, you have to get it removed, but once that's done, you'll most likely be fine.
Personal sacrifice = solution.

Country: The banks are screwed, but they just need x amount of a bailout, and that should solve it.
Little bit of tax payers money being wasted = solution.

Cancer: So you have the operation - and you feel good, tests show everything's fine.
But you have suspicions... you start to feel more lumps around your neck - that's not good.
You head back to the doctor - get more tests.

Country: So banks are bailed out - everything is good..
But then the banks seem to need more money, looks like the financial problems of the country won't be solved with a quick fix.
Need to investigate more.

Cancer: They find, low and behold, a whole cancerous system in your chest that is inoperable.

Shit.

Prognosis:
Doomed.

Possible solutions?:
Chemotherapy = losing hair, losing weight, puking, low immune system, low energy = suffering
Radiation = long term damage, potential secondary cancers caused, sore skin, everyday treatment = suffering
Or both.

Will it be enough? Probably not- you'll probably need more, and more and more.

Action plan: Check it on the internet, read all sorts of opinions, educate myself on the disease.

Results?:
Determine the doctor's decisions to be wrong - they should have checked my neck first, they should have done the scan first, the first doctor should have noticed it, they say too much chemotherapy, they say too little chemotherapy...

How I felt?:
Fearful, panic stricken, helpless, out of control.

Country: You know the deal.

Prognosis:
Doomed.

Possible solutions?:
Cut backs = less money, fewer jobs, more poverty, less services, more sadness = whole population will suffer
Higher Taxes = less money, fewer jobs, more poverty, less services, more sadness = whole population will suffer
Will it be enough? Who knows?

Action plan: Check it on the internet, what happened in the past, educate ourselves on the country's finances... we are all experts.

Results?:
We determine the politician's decisions to be wrong - they should have blah blah blah...

How we feel?:
Collectively:
Fearful, panic stricken, helpless, out of control.

So here we are - stuck in that awful moment between diagnosis and action plan.

What do we do? What's the best route to take? What if we make the wrong decision? What if it just keeps getting worse? Will it spread? Will I lose my job too? Will my lungs be affected as well? My liver? If we wait too long to treat, will it get worse? Who can help us?

With cancer, it's glorious to be able to put big decisions in the hands of your doctor - someone who knows better - that you can trust to try his/her best, so you can concentrate on making your life the best it can be under the circumstances.

With our country, we need someone to step up and say they are the "doctor", and that they will try to fix us. That we can put our trust in them.

With an action plan in place, even if it consists of a long path of suffering in order to attain ultimate release, it's a blessing, because then we can start the process of pulling together, working together and getting on with it. It would be nice to be finally doing something to get better. Sitting and waiting and panicking in fear is shit.

Out of all pain comes growth, and learning and huge change, change for the better, change for the smarter, and change that impacts the long term, that inevitably makes life much much better for all of us.

But with no such doctor figure, we all seem to be in limbo, waiting for someone to take action. I can handle suffering if I know it's for an eventual solution, but waiting in fear and panic is worse than any chemotherapy. So could our politicians please do something, to try to regain our trust and to give us an action plan please?!

Jack of all trades or master of one?

I am reminded of a post I wrote about mutantspace.ie, where you can donate a few hours of your time per week in what you are good at, to get other resources in return, and I was faced with the question : "What am I good at?".

With the recession kicking, I refuse to indulge in its negative connotations, however it does bring up the question in all of our minds - that if someone has lost their job, or their company, that was developed through years of struggle, on the way to earning expert status in a particular field, do they have to fuckinhg start at the bottom again?

I bet they are left wondering: "What am I good at?" or more likely: "What will someone pay me to do?" How depressing to find yourself at the bottom of the heap again, at the back of the race.

I'm still no further down this personal line of inquiry, and the impatience is making me weary, the frustration of having to wait, and work, and be determined, and be passionate, and do what I love is wearing me down. I am impatient to be an expert. Especially since what I am working towards being an expert at seems to alter daily, and then I'm constantly back at square one - 10,000 hours (according to Malcolm Gladwell) from expert status.

It's all envy, envy of people who are Tai chi teachers and can hold tai chi classes on Kilkee beach (Tues & Thurs at 10a.m - 12 if you're interested); envious of people who have meditated for years on end, and have reached clarity of mind, envious of those who have published books and have a smooth stream of income, envious of people who are successful chefs, or entrepreneurs, even those people who have a large following on twitter, I envy.

Perhaps it's the stage I am at in life, that stage where it seems like everyone around me is an expert. That or I'm just having a bad week.



It feels like I'm always playing catch up, and I'm not the only one - there are short cuts advertised everywhere for mugs like us - Bill Harris of Holosync claims you can reach the mental level of a person who has meditated for 20 years in only a few months; slow starters to twitter are tempted to cut corners by following links the promise: "Get 400 followers on twitter here". Why are we always trying to catch up on those random few who managed to invest their time in a noble cause right from the start, or so it seems, and now the "gap" between them and us just widens into an expanse so great that we dare not begin the journey because we know who has already won the race.

It doesn't help that we are running events that surround experts - these illusive people who we pay to see, to hear their story of how they did it - how they managed to get through the frustration and emerge, triumphant.

But is there a day when you turn around and say, "Now, I'm officially an expert"? Or is there always someone ahead of you?

I think most of us pay to see these experts to be inspired, to keep our heads above water, and to be reminded that it is possible, but it takes time. However there is a tiny part of our brains that listens to the expert's life story with a hint of delirium, we perk up our ears, gullible and hopeful fools, waiting for that one expert to turn around and say - you know, it wasn't a lot of hard work and persistence, it wasn't 10 years of working nonstop with determination, and drive, and consistency and never giving up. I just woke up one day, and I had made it.

But why does our society reward people who are masters in the first place? Instead of a jack of all trades? Why do we revere people who are at the top of a single tree of expertise, in the middle of a forest of knowledge?

What I listen for now, hopeful, gullible Ellen is for the expert to say, "I liked lots of different things, and it turns out, I was rewarded for never choosing only one or two. Now a lot of people pay me just to be me."

I don't want to be a master of just one area. I think the world has so much more to offer than sticking your head in one particular topic and following it for a lifetime. It's easier, (is it?) to just be a Biomedical Engineer for instance, and work your way to the top... but when you're at the top, what then? With the world opening up, and knowledge so readily available, it becomes almost absurd to concentrate all your energy on just one theme.

So instead of trying to follow the common rules of society which state that you need to be a master of one thing, how boring is that! I am going to buck the curve, (to make myself feel better) and open up to the possibility of the alternative which is being interested in, and average at, a lot of things. I am now officially a master at not being a master. So hands up who'll pay me for that? ;)

Why do we like the things we like?

Why do I think horse riding is dull, and surfing is cool? Why do I alert my eyes from anything remotely related to politics in the newspapers, or change the radio station when a song I don't like comes on? I would say change the channel on television as well, but we don't have tv, so that saves me the effort of wondering. Why do we stick to the things we like, and avoid the things we dislike? Is that a stupid question? It seems silly when I read back over it - of course we would avoid the things we dislike - why would we purchase a dress that makes us look like a badly drawn avatar, or biscuits that taste like rotten tomatoes, if we could picture our dressed up selves on the cover of magazines and delight our tastebuds with tongue tingling, chocolate coated cookies? It's obvious, isn't it?

But what about with activities, or jobs? What makes us dislike.... ummm.... programming for instance, and love.... writing? No personal opinions being voiced here, she says, clearing her throat.

I walked into an event related with film making in the Belltable recently, with Clare Creely of FilmBase. She was discussing the various programs that are available for aspiring film makers to find funds for their fantasy film - RTE competitions, Irish Film Board etc. She was explaining all the intricacies of getting funding, how you first need to have your film screened at one of the multitude of film festivals that showcase filmmakers work. This is a film that you manage to make with... what money? I wondered. I thought it was hard for writers - sure everyone wants to be a writer these days, or is a writer should I say, with blogs and twitter posts coming out of people's nostrils, but film making, now that brought me to a whole new level of respect for what these aspiring artists have to go through in order to become seen and be successful. Because unlike blogging, and wiling away the hours in your parents garage on the dole writing endless reams of chapters for potential publication, making a film requires other people, and equipment which ain't cheap. You need actors, and a director and a production crew, and a camera man, and.... low and behold, it all started to sound tremendously exciting this filmmaking lark. Knowing only how to rent a film, download a film, which I would never do by the way, purchase a film and watch a film, this was all news to me. That it can take over a year to produce a single short film, shocking! That you are competing with hundreds of other entrants to competitions for a shot at pennies to help you pay for the equipment, how unfair! That you are inevitably on a long, dreary, depressingly distant road to success, fighting off your fellow believers for the pot of gold at the end of the journey with only a shabby second-hand camera that someone was kind enough to leave you when they renounced the calling, that you can't use as a weapon until you win a prize at an overcrowded competition that will perhaps, when you are 55, generously reward you with enough cash for a new one.

As difficult as it all sounded, she then proceeded to show us some successful short films made by Irish film makers, and I realised - it's possible. It sounds pretty impossible, but people have gotten funding, people are making films, and although the funding has decreased, and the people entering the field are increasing, which means it will get even more difficult I would imagine... the fact remains that there are people who get through that Dip as Seth Godin would call it, and find their pot of gold, which is not so illusive after all. Now why anyone would want to torture themselves by wanting to be a filmmaker in the first place when they can get a job after university that actually pays real money, that you can exchange for those delicious cookies we talked about earlier, is probably as baffling as why anyone would want to put themselves up against the multitude of writers out there, or the multitude of websites, again, no personal opinions here...

Sometimes I wonder who are worse off - the people who want to be film makers, and who are passionate about it, or those who don't know what they want to be, and spend a lifetime trying to figure it out.

So why did I know nothing about film making, and never even give it a second thought? It's not that I even thought it was boring, I didn't feel anything about it, I didn't even know it existed, she says, an avid film watcher not knowing that there is an industry called film making.

I watch those credits after films and I am just baffled at the amount of people required to create a film, and not only that, the organisation of all of those people... wow. It's as though all I could see was gigantic, established organisations that put films on discs in some technologically advanced factory somewhere; they get shipped out by DHL in slim space saving boxes, with pretty pictures, and I promptly pay money to rent them, or buy them, and eventually watch them. Someone makes a lot of money, and they entertain a lot of people. Done. Or did. Now I know more... enough to know that I officially like film making, even though I don't do film making...



Which brings me back to wondering why we like the things that we like; and not the things that we don't? I want to find out more about these worlds that exist without me even registering their existence, the things I don't even know enough about to like, or dislike, but how do you learn about something that you can't see? Wandering into events not targeted at me seems to be a good place to start - and anyone thinking of doing just that, can come along to our event with Stuart Kershaw in Dublin on July 18th - had to get a plug in there somewhere! If you don't know anything about film making, or adventure sports, and don't know why you don't like or dislike them, come along, you might find you like something.

Self Esteem

Does it really benefit you to have unyielding belief in yourself? Obviously if you feel good about yourself, your quality of life must be pretty high. But in terms of success... I would have thought that the higher your self esteem, the higher your achievement in life. That if you believe indiscriminately in your ability to do something, then that will lead you to go out and achieve it, where a person with less self esteem would falter, and be too unsure of themselves to take the next step.

In an article by Jonah Lehrer today, Self Esteem, it turns out that the better you feel about yourself does not translate directly into actual academic achievement:

"Self-esteem has gone up in the United States; achievement has not. If anything, compared with other countries, we have done worse, but our kids feel really good about themselves on average."

Now academic achievement and achievement in life are two very different things, and how do you even define achievement in life these days - everyone has different measures for success - but it will be interesting to see where these kids they are following end up in life.

It's quite a liberating discovery if in fact self esteem is not critical to success. It's painful to constantly question your own abilities and wonder when the world will finally see through your feigned attempts to brush over inadequacies.... I remember Padraig O'Morain's article about just this topic - The Common Experience of Feeling Like an Imposter... but if you knew that the low self esteem and consequent fear of rejection and failure are not necessarily detrimental to your ability to success, then you can go on and feel them in... comfort, I guess.

Those "kicks in the face", thanks Maura for the terminology, that we struggling writers are constantly on the receiving end of, must feel like... generous helpings of praise? How does that work?

I suppose having blind faith in an ability that may not exist can lead to embarrassing outcomes. That must be the reason for those deluded people who enter The X Factor, Pop Idol, or You're a Star, singing completely out of tune. I always wondered what was going on there...



I suppose just because you think you are good at something, doesn't necessarily make it true, but how much happier would you be if you had blind ignorance :)

Have you become your own worst employer?

When you leave a 9-5 job, it seems obvious that you can now embrace a new you. You can relinquish the classic structure and etiquette typical of a worker bee in a corporate environment and be finally free. You are free to grow dreadlocks, or shave your head, you can get piercings in all sorts of visible places, or big dirty tattoos, why not? (Why all of the associations of freedom are based on this clichéd image are not something to be proud of, but there you go...) However, unless you have a deep desire to damage or inflict pain on your body, or hair for that matter, in order to prove to yourself, or anyone else, that you are now an entrepreneur, this may not be the correct course of action for you.

You could express your own individual personality and style through following fashion trends of your own choosing, instead, right? Not having to worry about what your employer or fellow workers would deem suitable now that you run the show, you can be free to express your own true style and identity. However, it may come to your attention that the image of the new company that you are bringing into existence has its own identity, and its one that you need to impart to the world, fashionably, in order for it to be successful. It may only represent part, but not all of who you are; it may even hold a personality of a particularly distinct category. Do you now find yourself being in a sense, your own “employer” and imparting certain traditions and rules to the clothes that you now deem suitable for [insert your company name here].

So not being able to quite clearly be who you are with body art, or indeed through fashion choices, you may think that at the very least, you can be honest in your writing; you can be free of the shackles imposed by previous employers who controlled the way in which you expressed your ideas and thoughts on paper. Remember the manner of speaking in emails, documents and proposals in industry, all formalised and following a regulated structure and format. Yuck!

But has it occurred to you to take a look at what you are writing these days, or should I say, how you are writing? Is there an air of, dare I say, regulated structure and formal phrasing? Any

“Dear esteemed sir,

Please find attached the proposal that we heretofore discussed on the telephone.

Please don’t hesitate to get in touch with me at your leisure if this would be something that you would like to consider.

Thanking you kindly in advance for your highly valued contributions,

With kind regards” kind of malarkey?

Who are you becoming? This is not supposed to be happening now that you are “free”, remember?! What happened to illusions of emails with,

“Hi stevie,
Here’s that doc we chatted about earlier. Get back to me if you like it, if not, your loss!
Later,”

Where is the right balance you may ask? Honesty in writing can be dangerous, if you are telling people to fuck off on a regular basis, even if that’s what you do indeed feel like saying, you may never make any money...

Seriously though, if you write with too much structure, and prevent emotion from flowing freely through your words, if you dress too much for success and cover up the body art to fit into your idea of the identity of your company, then you risk hiding your passion and enthusiasm for [insert company name here], and you may never be able to attract “the people who care” to your ideas for change.

It takes guts to show the true you, and I remember to respect those who are following their own rhythm in life, saying who the fuck cares. I am listening hard to my own advice here, the message lies behind the humour, somewhere.

All ideas presented here are fiction and do not in anyway represent the opinions of the writer...

Dreaming of paid time off and learning holidays in the sun

Damn Gary Quinn and his surf board toting article in the Irish Times. Is he paid by the Irish Times to take such a holiday, or is he sponsored by eurolanguages.com, both of whom benefit from his Spanish in the surf? What a perfect job, and why don't I have it? His magical tale wraps itself around my brain, like a boa constrictor, threatening to squish my happiness and delusion in my own day to day life. A week in Spain eating glorious Spanish food, taking afternoon siestas, and lapping up the lessons in the surf, while learning a language sounds utterly sublime as I sit mired in to-do lists that never seem to get any shorter. The break sounds utterly delicious, and I am wracking my brains trying to figure out how I can build a business that will enable me to take the time off and indeed pay for such an adventure... today.

I check out the website recommended, and torture myself looking at French packages with cooking lessons attached. "The reviews are all so positive," I notice, "and they are so cheap, especially considering what you are gaining."

Clicking on a link where I am shown the registration fee that wasn't included in the original price, I hear the voice in my head wavering a little, "Even if they do add on a whopping registration fee, and aren't including the cost of food or accommodation... these things will sort themselves out..."

Who am I kidding? Deluded I must be as I have neglected to remember that I am bordering on a vegan and I can't think of anything worse than seeing all that cream, cheese and butter not to mention meat, being used in French delicacies that I can't sample. Obviously the article has found a part of my brain that has no logic, and imbedded itself so deeply that reality has gone out the window.

What happened to my idea of living in the now, in the moment, not needing to buy things or be a "consumer".

I resigned from my job a couple of weeks ago, convinced that the business idea that we had, www.meetforeal.com, was strong enough, is strong enough, to create jobs for both myself and my partner. Although I still believe this to be true, it sometimes breaks my heart to see how long the road is ahead, and how tough it's going to be to get through the Seth Godin "Dip" and into the land of "scarcity creating value", when our events will effortlessly pull in both the sponsors and the punters. I know that day exists, but how far away it is I cannot measure, and until I can see it in my sights, its saliva drooling, logic out the window dreaming for me, and a matter of postponing all those learning holidays in the sun until a future date... Just another to-do list for me to monitor.

Are you an extravert or an introvert?

Reading Dorothy Rowe's book "Dorothy Rowe's Guide to life" changed the way I see the world. For anyone who hasn't heard her theories, I'll try and explain my favourite one.

She reckons that we are all either introverts, or extraverts. Not extrovert but extravert, with an 'a' (brings up memories of explaining meetforeal, with one 'r':-)).

Before I explain the difference, let me just clarify that apart from this initial identification which she perceives to be a determined characteristic, she then goes on to say that the secret of life is that we are capable of changing anything in our lives. That it is our specific set of beliefs, and the meaning structure which we have developed, unique to each individual, that shapes our view of the world around us, and this structure can be changed by allowing ourselves to see the structure itself, and step outside of it.

This links in nicely with the event we are holding in a couple weeks for anyone who is interested in thinking, and awareness, and how we can change the way we see the world, and the difficulties we perceive that we face... more details here; but anyway, I'll stop waffling and get to the point!

Introverts and extraverts can have the same external results: in this simple exercise you can see that Mary feels it's important for her to be on time for meetings, but when you do the ladder exercise, you can see that depending on her reasons behind the act, she shows whether she is an introvert or an extravert. So it's the reasons behind WHY you do something, not necessarily the behaviour itself.

Let me do the ladder exercise.

So Mary likes being on time for meetings, she feels its important.

Interviewer: "Why?"

Mary: "Because I don't want to be late"

Interviewer: "But why don't you want to be late?"

Mary: "Because I want to get the most out of the meeting, be fresh and alert and not stressed"

Interviewer: "And why is it important for you not to be stressed?"

Mary: "Because then I can achieve my best."

Interviewer: "Why is it important for you to achieve your best?"

Mary: "Because it's important for me to achieve my best!"

This is where the ladder may run out... and if it does, it can be said that Mary may be an introvert: she experiences her sense of existence as achieving.

If however Mary continues and says:

Mary: "Because it's important to me that the people at the meeting see me at my best, and have the best possible opinion of me."

Interviewer: "So is it important that others see you at your best?"

Mary: "Yes, of course."

Here, Mary shows that she may be an extravert, that she experiences her sense of existence as being in relationship to other people.

Introvert:Experiencing your sense of existence as developing, organizing clarifying, achieving; seeing the threat of the annihilation of your existence as disorder, mess and chaos.

Extravert:Experiencing your sense of existence as being in relationship to other people; seeing the threat of annihilation of your existence as rejection and abandonment.

An Introvert will be more inclined to doubt his/her external reality e.g. feeling of not really being there.

An Extravert will be more inclined to doubt his/her internal reality e.g. sense of loss of self.

This is because the Introvert listens more to their internal reality, while the Extravert listens more to their external reality.

An Introverts idea of being alone is of themselves on an empty planet.
An Extraverts idea of being alone is of being isolated and often rejected.

An Introvert's ultimate aim is personal achievement.
An Extravert's ultimate aim is good relationships.

An Introvert will leave a group of people because they feel over-stimulated.
An Extravert will leave a group of people because they fear rejection.

However, as I mentioned, being an introvert, or extravert can have similar results externally. And depending on how good you feel about yourself, can alter how you express this part of yourself.

Obviously, this is a short, very simplistic, explanation, but if you find it interesting, she has written books on the subject.

She says that in almost every couple, there is an introvert and an extravert, even though initially it may seem like both of you are one or the other.

So I found that I am an extravert, which seemed initially odd to me, because that means Adrian is the introvert, yet he is the one holding "talking to strangers" workshops, but it's obvious that he pushes himself to achieve these things as he feels they are important in his life.

And on further investigation, I remember writing this diary entry, below, over 6 months ago, and after reading it, I know I am an extravert! That combined with the fact that I struggled to write this because its important for me to please my readers, and I don't want to turn you against Dorothy Rowes writing because of something I have mentioned here!! But anyhow, here's some of my journal, maybe it will resonate with some of you extraverts, and if it doesn't, I guess you are an introvert... :-)

By the way why is this important you may ask?

Because she says that for introverts, it's important that they have something in their lives through which they can fulfil their requirement for a sense of achievement; and for extraverts, it's important that they have a close network of people who they can feel identified with, who support them and love them. So its something to keep in mind.

My diary:

I was cycling home today from work, and it just occurred to me. What if I had no where to go? And why do I need to get home so badly anyhow? Do I have something pressing to do? I know that when I get home, I will wonder what to do next. And if I had no home to go to, no destination in mind, what would I do? Where would I go?

I suppose we fight our whole lives not to have to have the sensation of not having a home to go to. Except people who are homeless and choose to be. Perhaps I will one day find our their reasoning behind it. Or the travelling community, or gypsies, who spend their whole lives moving from one point to the next. However they have a home, their caravan.

As the world is becoming globalised, for the first time we do have the choice of not going home, of not going to work, of taking a flight and just arriving with no destination in mind, no hotel booked. All you need is money and perseverance and a lot of balls.

That, coupled with the new sensation of meeting new people, new faces everyday, means that the world we live in is drastically different from that which we evolved in. And as such, these sensations are both petrifying and incredibly satisfying. Meeting new people leaves you with a temporary buzz, and the act of stepping out of your comfort zone to even spend a few days in another country, far from home, is tempting enough to keep a number of huge businesses ticking over.

But what if we were to only meet new people. And what if we were to never settle down. What if that holiday became a life, and the movement ensured that you never met the same person enough times to get to know them. That would be isolation of the highest order. People do it. Jobs are the main reason why, but there are others who seek such isolation, and after a number of years of this behaviour, the people they knew in a place called "Home" either move on, or die away, and the language attached to the birthplace become meddled with the languages of current destinations, and there no longer is a home to go back to.

I wonder what that feels like. Just the thought of not having a destination after I'm finished work causes my heart to beat a little faster. I can't imagine what it would be like to be without a home on this earth.

I often seek isolation, avoiding my workmates in order to have lunch alone. I take it outside or I deliberately go at a time when I know they will be busy. And I enjoy it. That time when I am alone, free to do as I wish. No conversations to attempt, no small talk to create, I am satisfied and comfortable.

But after a few days of isolating lunches, I realise that I am out of the loop, I have no friends at work, no one to talk to, no one to tell my news to. I have no small talk to make as I have spent so much time by myself that they don't open up to me, and I am lost in conversations. So those few moments I steal to spend alone have repercussions beyond measure. And yet I still delight in them. The forbidden act, which I know is all the more forbidden now because it is not a productive behaviour.

And as I cycle home, I know that I can stray off the path, I can bypass home and go into town, there is nothing stopping me. But somehow there is a sensation that it is wrong. And that emptiness fills me as I realise that if I do not go home, that there is no reason to be here. Is there a meaning to life if you have no home to go to? If you have no people to talk to? If you have no one who knows you, loves you or misses you?

Forum Bullies

Forums are scary places. I know they are a way that people can communicate based on common interests, but for newbies, they can be dangerous places. On a recent attempt to post details about an event we were holding, I had the sensation that I was an uninvited guest to a buzzing party. The reactions I got to my post were immediate and threatening, as if the long standing posters on the forum were marking their territory, peeing all around it, showing me their fangs from the sidelines, and telling me to back off.

It's funny how people behave as though they are in a different world online - a world where manners don't need to be upheld because people are anonymous. Without the addition of facial expression or tone of voice, so much can be hurtful and misunderstood. Why does this "freedom" to write and say whatever you want to say appear so different from communication in real life encounters? I have never felt such complete and utter disregard for the effort we are making, or the work we are putting in at face to face contact - only online have I felt such aggressive, negative language, so quick to put down, to judge.

There's a different set of rules for forum playgrounds, and the bullies are evident, some stacking up a whopping 6 months, 12 hours a day worth of posts (I calculated) - an embarrassing amount of their lives on these places - dishing out criticism as though their opinions represent those of the masses, their fear at a newcomer evident in their immediate derisive language.

With so many forums popping up all over the place, with little or no moderation evident, is it time to look at the ways we communicate, and why we feel that it's acceptable to spend so much of our lives speaking to one another in such an anti social manner? Or do we simply need to weed out the bullies on these forums and remind them that newcomers, like newcomers to a party, should not be immediately judged, stared at and whispered about, deemed different and an outsider, but welcomed, and introduced to everyone, with an open mind and a smile of recognition at how hard it can be to walk into a room full of strangers, online or in real life.

Waiting Rooms

Is it just me or do waiting rooms give you the jitters?

Waiting in Government funding offices, clutching your recently printed reformatted, readjusted, rewritten business plan in sweaty hands, practising the words of your carefully crafted presentation that tumble and stick in your brain, waiting to see if you are accepted or rejected. Sucked in or spit out.

Hospital waiting rooms, surrounded by crying families, sniffling children and day time television, expecting results from two-week old studies that involved numerous blood sucking and technologically baffling swivelling apparatus that have the capacity to tell you your fate. Waiting to see if, according to the experts, you will live to see another day, or if you have to endure yet more of the same painful procedures before you will know the truth.

Waiting for a job interview, watching the other applicants exit with smiles on their faces, and sweat patches encircling the underarms of their once pristine interview outfits. Waiting to see if your job experience, and your personality, is enough to beat all of the others.

What has somehow come to pass is that the negative associations of waiting rooms have now been transferred in my brain to the simple act of waiting in a room, regardless of the situation. Perhaps it is now inbuilt in the act of sitting on a comfortable couch, overseen by a receptionist, surrounded by boring, germ ridden magazines. Even when the outcomes are slightly less important, with less of the unexpected nature about them - if my hair will still be manageable for instance - with none of the pressure, none of the life changing consequences that are attached to other scenarios, I still feel my body contract, screaming - "get me out of here!"

Next time I am meeting with one of you for some reason or another, I have one request - please don't keep me waiting :)

Ellen

Grounded in Time

I'm just back from walking in the Spanish Countryside for 8 days on the Camino de Santiago de Compostela. This time we walked from St Jean Pied de Port to Pamplona; and from Logrono to Burgos. 8 days in total. The camino is something that is quite unusual to be described as a holiday activity. It seems a crazy endeavour - to participate in a gruelling experience that can only be described as painful and challenging, all to reach the distance that a 2 hour bus journey would cover. It is evident after a few hours of pain that walking is not the most efficient or effective means of transportation!



I'm trying to think of what I learned. Every day there was a new lesson, but apart from patience, and tenacity, finding new pain thresholds, and self belief to continue and reach my goal, I think that coming home after doing the walk I find myself much more grounded in time.

Starting your own company is so difficult. People envy the idea of working for yourself - your own hours, your own ideas, your own expectations, and your own dreams, but in reality, although the magic is there, it can be a whirlwind of never-ending to do lists, stressful self-inflicted deadlines and it feels like it will take forever to reach your destination.

After walking for 7-8 hours a day, my minds complete and utter intoxication with "work" and the excitement I feel everyday on encountering problems and identifying possibilities began to lose its stickiness, and gradually I was released from its sucking grip. I remembered what it was like to not have meetforeal on my mind 24 hours a day.

On coming home, I am pleased to find that I have learned something about work from my long hours on the road. I've learned that as long as you have a destination in mind, and self belief that you can get there, you can make it, and when exactly you get there does not necessarily matter. Of course it's nice to have a deadline, and expectations, but if you just keep walking, you will arrive.

Sometimes you have someone beside you, sometimes you're alone; sometimes it's up hills, sometimes the ground is muddy, or stony, sometimes all you can feel is pain, foot pain, knee pain, ankle pain, hip pain, hunger, dizziness, heavy bag pain; sometimes you feel like you won't make it, can't make it, don't want to make it anyway, and then the ground levels out or you reach a bench near a fountain and you can catch your breath. Sometimes it's raining, sometimes the heat of the sun bears down on you and fills you with energy and light, sometimes it takes all your energy away.

You have to deal with naysayers, people who moan along the road beside you, who want to quit, and want you to quit, who say you can't make it, who don't have the same vision, and you have to leave them behind. You have to be with your own pain, your own heavy bag, your own feet and your own struggle, as each has their own.

And it's the people you meet, the places you visit, but the people you see them with that make every step worthwhile, every ounce of pain measurable against joy, and every inch of agony a step in the right direction.

The camino is like having a company, and walking along a long road to reach the destination that you have determined as being your goal, your milestone, your Santiago. Our Santiago was Burgos this time, with only 8 days to walk, and reaching Burgos was every bit as important as people walking for 30 days to reach Santiago de Compostela.

It reminded me that in reality, there is never enough time in life to do all of the things that we want to do, and yet at the same time, there is all the time in the world. That not everything can be done now, today; we can't reach our destination without walking there, step by step. Sometimes it feels like the steps are tiny, minuscule in fact, that no one would even notice the effort involved to travel such short distances, sometimes it can seem as though we are standing still, but then one day, you look back over the hills and trees, and you see just how far you've come.

So it is with renewed strength that I tackle my everyday tasks, without stress, with the knowledge that there will always be time enough to finish them, but that no matter how much time I have, there will never be enough.

Potential investors and peppermint tea, days to remember

Running a company is such a rollercoaster. No day, no moment is the same. From potential investors with 8 million to invest sitting in front of you, to psychology questionnaires and free peppermint tea in coffee shops, with a stranger leaning over to try and steal answers, the noticing of a foreign accent creating easy conversation. Met a lovely man who commented on my teeth - apparently my mother was a very healthy woman when she had me.

But getting back to the investment opportunity - you never know who you are talking to in this world. People are full of surprises, some moderately good, sometime nasty, and sometimes, very rarely, they are eye opening, sparkling juicy ones that pull you tightly to your seat, pour adrenaline through your veins and retain the moment firmly in the present, forcing you to contain dreams for the future and blessings of the past in suspension... which is good... great actually, that life can be so bursting with energy in the present, that you can forget to worry or plan, or even attempt to construct an idea of the future that tomorrow will bring, because each encounter you have now, means that you idea of tomorrow will never come to pass.

The reality we construct, if only it could be as wondrous, always, as these unexpected meetings and chance encounters.

It's all about being remarkable, asking for what's not apparently on offer and taking the next step, a step that can sometimes seem so easy, too easy, so that no one takes it, or seems so difficult that no one dares. But by daring to step, by daring to be different, or by daring to just be yourself and open to the possibilities that the random nature of life brings, your life can be so full of "life".

I go back to my original notion - that its human, face-to face encounters that capture the essence of life, the interactions on a real level with people in your environment, the random nature of people who float in their own unique bubbles of meaning structure, bumping off of each other, opening up to exchange a little of the air pressure inside. We all benefit and change by the encounters, and exchanges, and without them, we are alone, isolated, unchanged, unaltered, not necessarily unhappy, but not enthused with the different ways of seeing the world that others perspectives bring. Some cause change in tiny amounts, some in huge life altering exchanges, but all of them worth it.

Brad Sugars & Action Coach, Limerick

My head is swollen after 3 hours of a concrete sales pitch from Brad Sugars last night in Thomond Park, Limerick. What a wonderful setting to sell yourself as a business coach, feeding off the recent rugby success which occurred with, conveniently, a new coach on the sidelines.

His goal is to have a business coach for every business, and with just 300 businesses in Ireland availing of his coaches planted in Action Coach offices around the country, there’s a lot of opportunity for ActionCoach in Ireland. Selling his franchises at 100k a pop, it’s wasn’t only us business people that he was selling to.

I don’t doubt that business coaching works. And by god if we could learn how to sell like he did last night, we too would be millionaires. Such techniques, such passion, telling stories and anecdotes with the pure benefits of what coaching can bring you built in. He retired for the first time at age 26, and again when he had young kids, this time for 4 whole years before he got bored.

Can you ring up your people and say “I’m not coming to work for the next 6 months,” and have your business run without you? Have you thought about the fact that there are only 4000 weeks in one life if you live to be 80? “How many of those are you willing to waste?” he asked. I am going to do what he recommended - buy marbles to represent each of the weeks I have left, and put them in a jar, so I can throw one out each week...

He made me gag with envy, wanting what he’s got. I think 90% of us would have given anything to know what he knows, in order to have what he has.

In the heat of the moment, it wasn’t just envy making our blood boil with passion to buy whatever it was he was selling. He was so generous, giving massive bundles of value, teaching us how to make a difference in our businesses, for “FREE”. It endeared us to him. He connected with us. He expressed empathy, and he showed higher value, higher status, and all of those things that Adrian mentioned in his own talk at Bizcamp in Limerick. Free was not all free, as he had our undivided attention and put us in a vulnerable emotional state to better hammer home the message that we can all succeed to this magnitude with a coach by our side.

So good a salesman he was, that by the end of the evening I was convinced that meetforeal needed a business coach, and that we could afford one at a measly 3000 euro a month, no problem, because you see – “they earn their fee…”

With the audience members primed for purchase, full of offers of free alignment and the heartfelt request to order now before this offer runs out, his team of action coaches, perched around the sidelines of the 500 strong audience, reeled us in. Standing out in their red ties, they collected their prey, eager, converted leads in a heighty emotional state... easy money.

We stayed until the last of the milling around was done, and caught a glimpse of the Action Coaches going back to their leader for a debriefing session. I could see a sheath of grey tentacles unwrap from underneath his 8000 euro suit, of which he made sure to tell us earlier was one of six that he had purchased in one sitting. As they attached to each Action Coach red tie, their bodies went limp, their faces blank and lifeless. His tall Australian body curled into a ball, his voice dropped to low hum as his true alien form emerged...

Perhaps that last bit was not real... but I wouldn’t have been surprised!

Great News!!!

Hi all we manage to publish an Article in the Galway Advertiser for our meetforeal talk tomorrow with Sarah O'toole. We are excited about this because, well this paper publishes 70,000 copies around Galway county. Is just exciting go http://www.advertiser.ie/galway/article/10067

Wahoo! Its up and running!

www.meetforeal.com : check it out!